Ernie The Attorney

Irrational security, part II

Peggy Noonan's Wall St. Journal article The View from Gate 14 is provocative, not just for its indictment of our travel security system but also for her observations about George Bush. In case you forgot, she was a speech writer for Bush senior.

View from the cockpit

Cockpit Chronicles features periodic blog posts by pilot Kent Wien, all of which offer a fascinating inside view of the world of commercial airlines. This post winds up with an interesting account of running into Barack Obama on vacation in the Caribbean.

Rate my Conde Nast Travel Photo

I entered the Conde Nast travel photo competition with this entry (hope you don't have to register to see it).  The winner wins a trip for 2 to Cabo San Lucas.  Please feel free to vote my photo as a 5 star entry!  I promise to take great photos from Cabo if I somehow win.

The international law of golf cart rental

San Pedro is a small town on the island of Ambergris Caye, which is located off the coast of Belize.  It's a beautiful place to vacation: great fishing and great scuba diving.  There aren't many roads in San Pedro, and the few roads that exist are filled with sand.  Most people walk around.  If you want to traverse large distances then having a golf cart makes sense.  But, if you rent a golf cart, be sure to pay for the insurance rider if they offer it. Otherwise, you'll wind up in a complex international legal dispute like the couple from Phoenix.

Foggy memories of San Francisco

I arrived into SFO last Thursday afternoon and took BART into the city.  I sat behind a guy whose foot was tapping like a drummer as he talked to his friend in Seattle.  "Hey dude, listen, my battery's about to go dead so I'll have to catch you later," he said.  Then he held his LG flip-phone up to eye level and began playing a tetris-like game, rapidly placing falling shapes in the right slot.  He was impatient, and obviously very accomplished with his phone.  I'm guessing he worked in the tech industry.

As soon as I got into the city I bopped over to the Apple Store on Stockton, which was conveniently located only a block from the hotel. After I left the store (no purchases!) I stopped to buy a diet coke from the street vendor.  The battered white Styrofoam tip jar had a note: "Please leave some change, and contribute to my iPhone fund!"  In New Orleans, very few people have iPhones, but in San Francisco everyone either has one or wants one. 

On Saturday Becky and I went for a nice hike in Muir Woods and it was wonderful.  Just past the entrance, I felt myself enraptured by the canopy of tall trees.   An elderly couple with Brooklyn accents were arguing about the Sunnis and the Shias, and the future of Iraq.  Becky and I picked up our pace. We diverted from the wheelchair accessible path and started climbing.  The crowd thinned.  We passed a few people along the way, but all were stilled by the majestic beauty (or oxygen depleted by the arduous climb).  In any event, there was little noise.  Eventually, though, we did come across an oriental couple that emanated a strange tinny transistor radio-like sound.  It was Russian marching music.  Sigh.

The Golden Gate was foggy that day and, now that I'm back in New Orleans, so are my memories of San Francisco.  Perhaps that's because of the climate change, or perhaps its because of what I said to Robert Scoble when I visited with him (and Buzz Bruggeman) at the Fly Trap restaurant.  Anyway, it was a great trip. And I even managed to get some decent pictures to go with my lovely (but foggy) memories.

Yelp, a little louder would ya?

Have you heard about Yelp?  It's sort of a cross-breed of Amazon's user-reviews and the Yellow Pages' directory of local businesses.  Yelp has reviews of restaurants, bars, yoga studios, and whatever.  But the reviews are (did I mention this already?) by every day users.  Here's the New Orleans page.  Apparently, Yelp all the rage in cities like San Francisco.  Although I hear that in SF the vegans are on a major campaign to blast restaurants that aren't 'vegan friendly.'  That doesn't make sense to me.  I thought a non-meat diet was supposed to make you less aggressive.

Oh well.  Speaking of San Francisco, though, I'm heading there today.  I'll be there until Sunday, but probably won't have much time to socialize.  I'll be bopping around like a sub-atomic particle whose location can only be defined in terms of probabilities.  There is, however, a high-probability that at some point I'll be in the Apple Store.

Returning home

My mom's birthday is today, and she would have been 73 if she were still alive.  She's still alive, but just not in a way that we know how to describe very well.

My dad met my mom when he went to Panama after World War II.  They moved to New Orleans in 1954.  My parents visited Panama when I was about 9 months old and had a great time.  But from there things slid into a bad state. After my brother was born in 1963 they got divorced and began a big custody battle.  My mom came apart emotionally, and for years she refused to visit Panama.

Eventually things got better and, after about 12 years she went for a short visit to Panama with me, my brother and her second husband. Everything was great.  Supposedly.  She told us she was going to go to Panama for another short trip.  It was summertime so she asked my stepfather to send us down to Panama to be with her on her visit. After a few weeks of 'visiting' she told my brother and I that she was renting an apartment and we were staying there permanently.  A few weeks later she enrolled us in a Panamanian school where we were expected to speak Spanish and salute the Panamanian flag every Monday morning.  My brother and I became angry.

My father was angry too, and he came to Panama for the first time in many years.  We all plotted how to escape from Panama.  Things settled down for a few years and Stuart and I accepted our fate. We both learned Spanish and learned how to function in an unfamiliar culture. Things were starting to get good again.  But my senior year of high school, when it became apparent that I was going to leave to go to college in the United States, my mother started to unravel again.  My brother quickly escaped to New Orleans to live with my dad.  My mother continued to nosedive.  When I left for college  she came apart completely.  My grandfather sent her to a facility in Columbia for a few years.

Eventually she returned to Panama and settled down.  My brother and his wife, who had been living in Tokyo and then Barcelona, came to visit her and wound up staying to live there too.  They had two girls and my brother started a successful business.  Then about three years ago my dad moved down to Panama, where he is happy and well cared for.

I just got back from visiting my family in Panama and had a great time.  It's an amazing country with a rich history and wonderful people.  There's a lot to explore in Panama, and many mysteries to uncover.  For me, the greatest mystery is how my mother managed to lure so many people to Panama and entice them to live there permanently.  Why am I not living there too?  I guess, because I'm more obsessed with the mysteries of New Orleans.  Mysteries like those that Chris Rose describes in his recent article about returning home.

Home is a place that we are supposed to feel comfortable in.  But, sometimes that's not the case.  Maybe home is the place where you learn to appreciate life.  Sometimes that's a familiar and comfortable place, and sometimes it's an unfamiliar and uncomfortable place.  My mother taught me a lot of things, and so did my father.  But the most important things you learn are not really new things at all.  We already know everything we need to know, but we forget a lot. 

Today, I want to remember.  I want to remember the many kind words and thoughtful moments my mother shared with me.  My mother gave my brother and me many wonderful things, not the least of which was the precious gift of life.  Her sorrows have finally melted away, but her joy has been transplanted.   I hope I remember to water those joys every day.

Charleston, South Carolina

I've only been here for a day, and already I'm completely in love with Charleston.  It all started when Stanley Feldman came to New Orleans way back before Katrina.  He was from Charleston and had gone to Tulane, as had others in his family.  His son Aaron went to Tulane and played baseball for the Green Wave.  Stanley got in touch with me because he read my blog and wanted to meet when he came to town.  He bought me lunch at Martin Wine Cellar introduced me to his friend Roger Young, a judge from Charleston.  We had a great lunch and I really enjoyed meeting Judge Young and his son Hank.  Little did I know that I would find my way to Charleston.

A few months later Katrina came and I wandered about while blogging my adventures.  I got a nice email from Judge Young who had started reading my blog.  He told me that Charleston had endured great turmoil after Hurricane Hugo in 1989, and offered an encouraging perspective about the possibility for change.   But he was circumspect.  After all, he noted, his region had much stronger leadership than Louisiana's Governor Blano and New Orleans' Mayor Nagin.

Flash forward to last month when I asked my daughter Bridget if she wanted to go look at colleges during her Mardi Gras break.  She said yes and listed College of Charleston as one of her choices.  Fine with me, so I emailed Stanley and let him know I was coming.  Last night I met Stanley and he walked me around downtown and told me about the city.  He spoke highly of the wonderful Mayor of Charleston, Joe Riley.  He was first elected mayor in 1975 and has been reelected eight times.  Clearly, he is a beloved figure for most people here in this city.

This morning I went down to get breakfast and saw U.S. Senator Lindsey Graham in the lobby of the hotel.  He was without entourage, just meeting someone for a morning chat.  I was struck by how low-key he was and how people took his presence without any great fanfare.

After breakfast Bridget and her friend Maddie and I walked over to the College of Charleston. On the way I saw a man in a suit standing on a corner talking to a man and woman.  I didn't recognize him, but somehow he seemed important or purposeful in some way.  Just down the side street I spotted a hot dog vendor and walked over to get a diet coke.  The hot dog guy was talking to a cop, and as I approached they looked at me and asked if I had seen Mayor Riley. 

I told them I had seen someone on the corner but didn't recognize him.  They looked at me strangely, and so I explained I was from New Orleans.  They smiled and then observed as how Charleston and New Orleans were similar, except that Charleston had a great mayor and New Orleans had a pathetic one.  I smiled and nodded in agreement.

Tonight I had dinner with Judge Young, his wife Janice and and his two children. Judge Young's daughter is a sophomore at the College of Charleston; his son Hank has been accepted to Tulane (among other schools) and wants to study psychology.  Bridget said she was interested in psychology as well, and she admitted that she really liked the College of Charleston. 

Wouldn't it be strangely wonderful if Hank came to New Orleans and Bridget wound up in Charleston?  Well, no matter where they wind up I know that I'll definitely come back to here again soon.  This may be my favorite American city after New Orleans.   It's charmingly quaint and picturesque, with effusively friendly people and colorful shops and fabulous restaurants. Not to mention they have a great leader who doesn't ride around in a motorcade with flashing lights, but instead greets his constituents as he walks along King Street.

My faithful guide TomTom

I've long craved having a GPS device for my car.  But the prices seemed too high so I was waiting until they dropped.  I hadn't realized how far the prices had dropped until last month when I was browsing at Radio Shack and came across the TomTom series of devices.  Only $400 for a portable four-inch LCD touch screen unit pre-loaded with maps for the entire United States and Canada?  Hmmmmm.  And it comes with built-in Bluetooth and an integrated microphone to let you make or receive calls hands-free with Bluetooth-enabled cell phones. Yeah, this is starting to make sense.  What else? Oh, you can control your iPod playlists directly from the touch screen.  Okay, I'll take one.

When I got home I told my daughter Bridget that I got this device for her, since she was learning to drive and often had trouble finding her way around town.  Of course, that was true as well.  But let's face it: I had suffered a major 'impulsus purchasum' and now I was getting ready to have to face the truth that my new device might be something I rarely used, other than on road trips or out-of-town ventures.

I pulled the small device out of the package and turned it on and it was ready to go. I selected a lovely female British voice to read me my directions and set off to tool about town.  I chose a route to the local hardware store and noticed that Amanda picked a route I wouldn't normally take, but I followed it anyway since the display said that was the 'fastest route.'  It worked out fine.  After I finished shopping I got in the car and selected the big 'HOME' icon.  The proposed route was not one I wanted to follow so I decided to ignore Amanda's directions and drove to Magazine Street.  At first Amanda kept trying to steer me back to her preference.  But once I got to Magazine Street (a main artery) she immediately adapted and offered me the route that I wanted to take.

There is a lot to say about how amazing this device is.  The "points of interest" feature deserves special mention, because it turned out to be something that I use a lot around town.  Basically, you can tell the device to keep track of various kinds of POI's such as restaurants, gas stations, casinos etc.  You wouldn't think that this is a feature you would use in your familiar surroundings.  But you actually might.

I use it when I'm looking for a restaurant to go to and can't think of some place to go. Just ask to see restaurants nearby and review the list.  The only bad thing is that it lumps together fast food places with regular restaurants, but I'm sure that they'll fix that in some future edition.  And I noticed that the device didn't have some of the newer restaurants.  That required tweaking as well, but it's not a big problem to tweak the device.

You can update the mapping information by simply downloading it from the TomTom website.  The first update is free, and after thatn you pay a small fee.  You can also download maps for Europe for a fee, although the higher priced models come with European maps pre-installed.  Also, you can download 'celebrity voices' such as John Cleese's to use as your preferred voice.  Can you imagine driving around in London with John Cleese giving you directions?  Come on.  Does technology get any better than this?

The GPS devices are nice in your own city, but when you take them on the road they totally rock.  And, frankly, this is the reason I would never buy a built-in GPS for my car.  I want to be able to take my device with me wherever I go, and use it in rental cars if I want to.

This week I'm driving in the Southeast looking at colleges with my daughter Bridget, and having the GPS is a godsend.  I'm glad that I got familiar with the device before I took the trip though.  As I said, it's easy to use (you could almost just plug it in and take off on a road trip, but some things take getting used to).  The device is good at warning you ahead of time that you need to be in the right lane or left lane to make an exit, but it's nice to have a good feel for how it works so that you have a maximum level of comfort when you are in a completely unfamiliar place.

Yesterday I was on the phone with a client who happened to call just as I was reaching a critical turn point.  I had no problem listening closely to what he was saying and also following the directions given to me by the device (although I turned down the voice volume and just followed the visual cues on the display).  Having used this tool for a couple of days now I can safely say that I will never take an out of town trip without one of these devices again.  I rank GPS devices up there with cellphones and wifi technology as far as life-altering innovations go. 

I will say this, though.  If I had it to do over again, I'd probably get the Garmin Nuvi.  It's a little more expensive but it seems to be the clear preference of a lot of techies out there.  And I've noticed that my TomTom often takes too long to find the satellites when it first powers up.  So, there you have it.  If you are even remotely contemplating getting one of these devices then here are my recommendations:

• Don't get a car with this device permanently installed
• Check out the Garmin Nuvi devices
• Consider getting a device that you can use in the car or hold in your hand (so you can use it in places like New York, or Chicago where you are walking around etc.)
• Practice using it before you take it on the road.
• Bluetooth is nice, but not essential.  I don't really need to listen to my iPod through my GPS device or make hands free phone calls.  But maybe you do.

Last night I was talking to a fellow who is a pilot for the Air Force and flies, literally, all over the world.  We were talking about how cool GPS is, and yet how it does diminish your sense of 'situational awareness.'  By that he meant that he often flies across places in Eastern Europe and has almost no sense of where he is because he doesn't have to know.  I experienced that sensation as we left the University of Georgia yesterday.  The device powered up as I was lost in the middle of the Athens campus and quickly guided me out of town toward my destination of Charleston, South Carolina. 

I went from a strong awareness of being in the city of Athens, which I knew was an hour east of Atlanta, to having no idea where I was as I weaved along a lovely two lane highway.  On the other hand, I felt safe and was left free to admire the scenery.  The display constantly updated to tell me how many miles I was away from the next turn point, how long until I arrived at my destination, and what my estimated arrival time would be. 

Being on a backroad highway is heaven, but it's even more celestial when you are aided by a state-of-the art GPS display.

Panama - of tailors, spies and invasions

Since I'm in Panama let me take this opportunity to recommend The Tailor of Panama, a movie based on the John LeCarre novel.  There are many great quotes in this movie, but my favorite is when Harry Pendel greets the newcomer with a succinct assessment: "Welcome to Panama, Casablana without heros."

Some would dispute that statement, pointing out that there were American heros in Panama in 1989 when President George Herbert Walker Bush ordered a full-scale invasion. I was in New Orleans then, but I remember getting a call from my mother at 3 in the morning, and I could hear the gunfire in the background.  She was frightened, as were many other people in the country, especially those who lived near where the Panamanian military headquarters was located.  About 300 civilians were killed in the ensuing battles, but, in the end, the U.S. prevailed and captured Manuel Noriega and convicted him of drug charges.  Of course, the fact that we secretly supported Noriega for many years before then (knowing full well about his drug dealings) is a trivial matter that didn't undermine the nobilty of our venture.

If you want to understand how W could have planned to invade Iraq with such a flimsy pretext then review the invasion of Panama that his father ordered, which was called euphemistically enough: Operation Just Cause.   As it turned out, Panama flourished after Noriega's departure and the United States gave Panama about a billion dollars in aid.  Which makes me want to paraphrase Chico Escuela's famous line: "your invasion been berry berry good to me."

Speaking of which, I've been thinking that maybe New Orleans could use a major U.S. military invasion.  Oh right, I forgot: we had one just last year.  Anyhoo, it's often uplifting to reflect on our really successful military invasions.  You know, the ones where --even though there is a great loss of life and property-- it ends quickly, the invadees get a bunch of financial aid, the bad guys are convicted swiftly in a U.S. court, and everyone else lives happily ever after.

I think a good name for our next invasion would be "Operation Just Because."

Destination: Panama (after clearing security, of course)

My son and I arrived early at the New Orleans airport, 5 am to be exact.  We were heading to Panama to visit my brother and my dad, so we got in the line for "International Travel," which I noticed had a lot of commotion.  There were only about 10 people in the line but they all had their suitcases out on the floor and were rifling through them with great purpose.  "Great," I thought to myself, "the plane is going to be filled with neophyte travelers who don't know how to act."

Then I heard someone mutter something about airport security making us take all the liquids out of carry-on luggage.  Like what liquids, I wondered?  Wine bottles?  By now, you all know that this was the first wave of security readjustment dealing with a new terrorist threat.  The guy ahead of me in line was rude to the terminal agent because he was told that even toothpaste tubes had to be checked in, remarking that post-9/11 all of our liberties had been taken away.  The agent was polite and explained that there had been a security incident in London and they were doing the best they could.

When I got to the security checkpoint it was more pandemonium.  I was behind four kindly, but travel-unsavvy elderly women.  They were on some sort of joint venture and they were giddy with excitement, until they learned that they'd have to take off their shoes and blouse-jackets.  I practiced my slow-breathing exercises and tried to savor the insanity of the moment.

Then the scanner guy said, "folks we've got a problem."  Turned out that one of the grandmas had packed some liquids in her carry-on (go figure!).  She said "yes officer, I am carrying my perfume."  Well, he told her, she'd have to return to the terminal to check it.  To which she responded, "check it where?  They already checked my bag."  More attempt at explanation by the security guy, but the previously kindly and giddy grandmother straightened up her spine, arched her back, and bellowed "this is BULLSHIT!"  The security guard called for reinforcements and someone came to escort the foul-mouthed matron to the terminal.  She continued to exclaim the word "Bullshit" as she made her way back. I saw her later at the gate with her friends so apparently they didn't arrest her, but she wasn't pleased either.

I feel bad for the security guys.  They were just doing their job and I know that they have to make a good show of treating everyone fairly. But I'm also pretty sure that, if they were given some latitude to make common sense judgments, that our grandmothers and grandfathers would be treated better when they traveled. Or at least they wouldn't be driven to profanity.

When my son and I got to Panama we were waiting in line to pay the $10 entrance fee and I wound up talking to an American guy who seemed to know about the airport protocol in Panama.  I asked him if he traveled a lot to Panama.  He said he didn't used to, but now he was relocating his company to Panama so he had been here 6 times this year.  He has a call-center operation based in Miami.  But he found out that it was cheaper to operate in Panama, and that other companies had call-centers here (e.g. Dell computers has a few hundred employees here and HP is setting up a call center).  So, apparently this guy is moving his business here and also building a beautiful house on the beach.  He likes Panama, which apparently has everything he needs to be content.

I thought about it and silently agreed that Panama would be a nice place to live.  Then I thought about how strange it was for me to think that.

When I was twelve years old my mother hauled my brother and I to Panama and put us in a Panamanian school.  One day I was in part of a great country and the next day I was in some remote isthmus.  I hated it.  I wanted to live in a country that had a dynamic economy, one that was not isolated from the global stage.   When I was ready to go to college I left Panama and moved to New Orleans. A lot has happened to New Orleans (and the United States) since I left, and a lot has happened in Panama (and the rest of the world).

Leaving New Orleans today I felt like I was going to a more civilized world, although many people in the United States would consider Panama a 'third world country.'  Obviously, there are still a lot of advantages to living in the United States.  Many people from around the world make huge sacrifices to be able to come to the United States.  But, at the same time, an increasing number of people (and businesses) are finding that life outside the United States is pretty sweet too. 

Of course, wherever you are in the world (and I'm going out on a limb here) I predict that tomorrow will be a really rotten day to travel. Especially for the grandmothers flying out of London.  And God forbid they're toting laptop computers, mobile phones or iPods.  Those are not allowed in carry-on luggage if you're flying from England.

Heading off to San Francisco

I'm off to San Francisco tomorrow, and I'll be there until next Wednesday.  Hope to have some good pictures and thoughts to post from there. 

Boise Idaho

I enjoyed my stay in Boise.  From the moment I got off the plane and saw that the airport was permeated with free wifi (sponsored by MPC Computers) I knew that I had found a hospitable environment.  If you login to the wifi network you get to this page first (New Orleans take note).

Boise is a lovely town of about 200,000 people, who enjoy the clean environment and imperviousness to natural disaster (which a guy from New Orleans can appreciate).  Boise is the third largest city in the Northwest (after Seattle and Portland) and is home to companies like Micron Technology.  Hewlett Packard also has a large presence in Boise.  If I asked you where the largest concentration of Basque people living outside of the Basque Country (encompassing parts of Spain and France) was you would never guess Boise.  Apparently, there are about 20,000 Basques here.

Here's another interesting factoid for country music buffs.  Roger Miller was somewhere outside Chicago when he saw a sign that read "Trailers for Sale or Rent." He wrote the first verse, but got no further. When he got to Boise, Idaho he saw a hobo in an airport gift shop and that became the inspiration for the song "King of the Road."

The state of Idaho is interesting as well, with it's strange shape, nestled between Washington and Montana.  It's is the only state to be named as the result of a hoax. When a name was being selected for new territory, an eccentric lobbyist suggested the name, which supposedly was an Indian term meaning "gem of the mountains".  Later people learned that the lobbyist made the name up.  Hey, if you can't trust a lobbyist, who can you trust?  Idaho is the first state in U.S. to have a jewish governor, Moses Alexander, who served from 1915-19.

I had a great time in Boise and I hope to return here one day.  It was great to hang out with Steve Nipper and his family, and to meet his friends.  If you ever get the chance to come to Boise don't pass it up.

From New Orleans to Panama and back

My recent visit to Panama was very interesting, especially after living in post-Katrina ravaged New Orleans.  For those readers who may not know, I lived in Panama for about 4 years when I was a kid.  Basically, I went to high school in Panama after my mother, who was Panamanian, summarily hauled my brother and I there one summer.  For the first two years that I lived there I hated it.  Panama was, to my young mind, a backwards country.  There were only a few TV stations, most of which were spanish soap operas with a smattering of old U.S. shows that had been dubbed into Spanish (you've not lived until you've seen an episode of the Flintstones in Spanish). Today, Panama has all of the conveniences and technological marvels of any major U.S. city.  And right now it has more economic promise than many U.S. cities, particularly New Orleans.

Everywhere you look in Panama you see buildings being constructed.  It reminds me of New York in a weird kind of way. In fact, there is a plan to build a 102 story building on the shoreline of the Bay of Panama, next to the Pacific Ocean.  This would be the largest building in Central America, and it's not even going to be an office building; it will be a condominium building.  But business is booming in Panama too.  The stock of a Panamaian airline, COPA Airlines, recently went public on the New York Stock Exchange and the share price soared.  The tourism industry is a huge part of the economic boom, and Panamanians are working hard to publicize this fact and to attract more tourism.  Ecotourism is but one part of the picture.  Panama is also attractive to retirees, especially the area known as Boquete which is near the Costa Rican border.

In fact, I can attest to how attractive Panama is as a retirement destination with this personal vignette. My brother took me to a place about an hour outside of Panama City where he is building a beach house.  While we were there surveying his property we ran into the property developer who was showing the area to some prospective customers.  One was a  young guy named Steve, a british fellow who lives in New York and works as an investment banker.  Steve, it seems, met a guy in a bar who told him about how wonderful Panama was.   And so a year or so ago Steve visited Panama and liked it so much that he bought a condominium in the city. Now he is engaged to be married and planning on retiring from his hectic job.  Guess where he is planning on spending his significant retirement wealth?  Steve and his fiancee will not have trouble finding English-speaking friends who are similarly situated.  Many are already living in Panama, and more are on the way.

Obviously, beyond tourism, another (and more well-known) resource is the Panama Canal, through which about 1,000 ships pass each month.  The Canal, which was completed in 1914, is being modernized; and this is a billion dollar project, which will obviously create many great economic opportunities.  Incidentally, if you haven't read David McCollugh's The Path Between The Seas then you should.  It's a wonderful account of American ingenuity and engineering prowess (something that I long for a resurgence of as I drive around New Orleans these days).

Panama is a much different country than it was when I left there in 1977, right after Jimmy Carter signed the Treaty that returned control of the canal to the Panamanians.  I remember thinking that, without the influence and mass wealth of the United States to guide it, Panama would lapse into economic ruin (even after spending 5 years in a Panamanian school I still suffered from cultural bias that clouded my vision).  Panama now has all the modern conveniences that one would expect in any major U.S. city.  Everywhere you drive you see signs for Blockbuster video, McDonalds, TGIFridays, Popeyes.  Sitting in my father's 17th story condominium watching CNN, while wirelessly surfing the Internet it was hard to feel like I was in a place that many people regard as a third world country.  One mile in front of me was the Pacific Ocean framed by modern buildings and a perfectly blue sky.  Ten feet behind me was a cheerful maid, eager to bring any food or beverage I might yearn for.

When I got home to New Orleans, I asked my friend Vincent if anythinng new had happened in New Orleans while I was gone.  His face perked up and said, yes actually there were a couple of important developments.  "What's that?" I eagerly inquired.   "Oh, a couple of those blinking stop lights on Magazine Street have finally been fixed," he responded. 

"Yes, it's good to be back home" I muttered as I blankely stared  at images of an old sitcom rerun on the TV screen.

A day in the life of a New York City restaurant

One of the neat things I noticed in New York as I strolled around the Village was how people with dogs would eat at an outside table and  hold their dogs on a leash as they ate.  The owner would sit next to the little fence/barrier and the dog would sit on the outer side of the fence.  Obviously the dog can't sit inside the fence, right? This is because the NYC Dept of Health and Mental Hygiene (who knew there was such a thing as 'mental hygiene'?) prohibits the presence of animals in any area where food is prepared or served. 

Obviously the Health Dep't doesn't want rats and mice and cockroaches in these areas.  But they also don't want pets either, and a restaurant that allows the presence of pets in food service areas can get cited.  Most pet owners understand this, which is why you see dog owners taking up positions at the tables next to the outer barriers.

But what about cat owners?  I hadn't really considered them until my friend and I were in the Village strolling past Senor Swanky's when we saw a woman trying to get a table where she could eat with her kitty, who was inside a little 'cat stroller' like this one.

The greeter at Senor Swanky's (a young college aged girl) had the vague notion that this was against policy and told the eager woman that she'd have to check with the manager.  My friend and I, sensing a major news event in the making, decided to follow the greeter to overhear the conversation with the manager. 

Okay, so remember, the manager has not seen the 'cat stroller' and doesn't have the foggiest idea of what that sort of contraption it is.  When the greeter tells the manager that "there's a woman at the front who wants to come inside with a cat stroller" the manager asks for confirmation: "you mean she's got a cat in a stroller?"  The manager asks this as she squits toward the front of the restaurant like a cowboy scanning the horizon for attacking indians. She can't see the stroller (because she's looking too high, thinking--no doubt--that it's a baby stroller with a cat in it), but she senses its dangerous presence.

"Yes," the greeter reiterates.  "The cat is in a stroller."

Two second pause as the manager makes a quick assessment of the battlefield conditions, then: "No way," she exclaims.  "We can't have cats in here.  Tell her she'll have to take the cat away."

And with that swift decision Senor Swanky's avoided a potential run-in with the Department of Health and Mental Hygiene.  After all, sound health policy dictates that pets not be in restaurants.  And, while it's not on their website, I suspect the NYC Dept of Health would tell us that sound 'mental hygiene' suggests that people who push their cats around in strollers should not expect to gain entrance to restaurants.

From the Big Easy to the Big Apple

I'm off to New York City today, mostly for pleasure (and that's certainly easy to find there).  The weather is supposed to be slightly chllly and overcast and rainy.  No problem.  I like New York no matter what the weather.  One thing I plan to do is visit the newly renovated Museum of Modern Art, and I doubt it will be raining in there. 

Then it's off to audition for the next season of 'The Apprentice.'  (Just kidding, of course).  Anyone that thinks they can learn business skills by watching The Apprentice probably also thinks they can learn to pilot an F-14 by watching the movie Top Gun.  You don't have to own a business to learn important business skills, but that's probably the best way (and certainly better than watching TV). 

I learned some useful business skills while waiting tables at Commander's Palace. The owners of that successful New Orleans restaurant were pretty savvy, certainly smart enough to realize that--even though I learned a lot about the restaurant business and life in general during the three years I spent working there--I still wasn't qualified to take over their business.  Not even for a week.

So I'm not interested in hooking up with TV personalities and media mongers while I'm in New York.  But if anyone else in NYC wants to try to hook up, email me, TextMsg me (see phone# to the right) or call me on my cellphone (504-669-5150).  I can't promise to be available (since I'll be hanging with friends), but if we can hook up some kind of way I'm always up for meeting someone from the blogosphere.

Snow delayed Travel on Christmas

My daughters and I were excited about leaving this morning to go to Panama to visit my brother and my dad, but our flight out of New Orleans was delayed for over an hour as they de-iced the plane (or 'defrosted' as Bridget put it).  As a result of that delay we missed the only flight leaving for Panama today.  But Continental gave us each a complimentary dopp kit and put us up for the night at the Airport Hilton, where Wi-Fi and coffee are free in the lobby.

After we checked in we walked over to the Kettle Inn, just across the parking lot for a sumptuous Christmas meal (All You Can Eat Buffet for $7.98).  I suppose we could complain but it's not too bad.  I'm with my two daughters having a nice family outing.  Of course, we are all missing the snowball fights back in New Orleans which is having its first Christmas snow since 1954.

And here's a picture of my son with the snowman he built today (he didn't travel with us because of issues with his inner ear that are too laborious to explain here).  Anyway, last week he found out that he did very well on the PSAT, getting a perfect score in the math and composition sections.  This week he's demonstrating his engineering prowess by assembling his first snowman.

It's painful to be away from kids when they reach these important milestones...even when they are sixteen years old. 

Dress Smart for Airport Travel

If you are travelling by plane it behooves you to dress appropriately, as this post from Smart Mobs discusses.  I had thought about wearing easily removable shoes, but the wireless bra never occurred to me.

Great travel blog - CloudTravel

It's been awhile since I raved about what a great weblog CloudTravel is.  Time to rave again.  I was reading this post and learned that Orbitz lets you see how many seats have been sold on a particular flight.  Lots of other great travel information at CloudTravel if you are interested.

Things to do in New York

If I were in New York between August 30th to September 4th this is something I'd go see. I have always been interested in magic, and Marc Salem looks like a cool guy.

The Blogosphere's 'Travel Channel'

My friend Chris Cloud is one of those guys who, like me, probably has too many interests. He's a lawyer in New York (no longer practicing law) who plays in a blues band and likes to travel. Over a year ago I told him that he should start a weblog and he did, calling it Cloud Travel.

His site is hard to find even if you Google for 'Cloud Travel.' (the URL is 'www.cloudtravel.net' which is easy to remember, though). He's got some great essays, including one about Normandy, France as an essential side trip if you are visiting Paris. Yesterday Chris emailed me to let me know that his site is the current #1 hit on Google for the search term "Normandy France." I checked and sure enough it's true.

Once again I'm awed by the power of Google. And, of course, I'm very proud of Chris and his site, especially his prominent write up on Normandy. I think it would be great if somehow we arrange to get him the keys to the city.

Our man in Singapore

Shel Israel is in Singapore for a tech conference and he's blogging about his experiences. Read this post too, which contains his pre-departure thoughts about Singapore. Note as well the comments of the 24 year old Singaporean who came across Shel's post and offered his own observations about the misconceptions people have about his homeland.

Queen Mary's arrival in NYC

CloudTravel has a nice post about the QM2's arrival in New York. Of course, you should regularly consult CloudTravel for information on travel and leisure. Better yet, subscribe to the RSS feed.

Visiting Down Under - Info from 'cloudtravel'

Check out the cloudtravel guide on why you should visit Australia and New Zealand. Also check the photographs from Down Under .

And check in next week for the start of a serialized essay on great, easy places to visit by train during your next visit to London, including points in England, Wales, Scotland and Continental Europe.

A carousel in NYC's Central Park

CloudTravel: "In the middle of New York's Central Park is an old carousel that a lot of folks don't know about. The first carousel in Central Park opened in 1871 and was mule powered (the official carousel website says the mule was blind - a little extra drama)...."

CloudTravel is a great travel weblog

Glad to see my friend Chris Cloud's newly relocated travel blog is up and running. When he's not travelling, or doing his day-job gig, Chris is a no-holds barred blues guitarist with a band called Pinetops Boogiemen.